Wine News & Entertainment

99 Reasons To Drink Wine

Feel the need to justify your new wine habit? We’re here to remind you why you love wine with 99 reasons why you’ve been drinking it.

  1. Because fermentation is fascinating.
  2. There’s no such thing as wine-belly
  3. You need a serving of fruit everyday.
  4. Because beyond college, Master’s and Ph.D., this might just be the last tier of a higher education.
  5. You were going to give it as a gift, but decided to keep it for yourself.
  6. Some people find violet-stained teeth inexplicably attractive.
  7. You secretly enjoy the scent of sweaty saddle leather/ petroleum/ a mushroom forest.
  8. Because people look at you funny when you sniff, swirl, and slurp a glass of milk
  9. How else can you justify using words like supple, brawny, fleshy, and gripping.
  10. It pairs well with…well, everything.
  11. It stains your tongue (just like those awesome blue lollipops once did).
  12. How else are you going to finish that wine-cork Pinterest craft?
  13. Waking up with a wine line across your bottom lip is a token of a night well spent.
  14. You just learned how to properly pronounce Gah-vurz-tra-meener…even though you still can’t spell it.
  15. You recently watched a YouTube video on how to open a wine bottle without a corkscrew and you had to give it a try yourself.
  16. Mimosas are an acceptable breakfast food.
  17. You’re so fancy (Iggy Azalea).
  18. Because the pursuit of happiness is an unalienable right (and the movie was pretty good too).
  19. Taylor Swift songs put you in the mood for a glass of red. #love-em #hate-em
  20. You still believe in the merits of 2-Buck Chuck.
  21. You wanted to class-up the block party.
  22. It makes you socially fearless.
  23. Your Spanish conjugations improve after a glass or two.
  24. It’s important to hydrate after waking up.
  25. The Pope does.
  26. They say it’s always 5 o’clock somewhere, even though it turns out that’s really not true.
  27. Stemmed wineglasses make you feel like a real adult.
  28. You need something to wash down an awkward social experience.
  29. The recipe calls for 2 TB of white wine and you don’t believe in wastefulness.
  30. You can’t afford a massage and this is the next best thing.
  31. Wine tasting is like bar hopping during the day.
  32. Wine keeps you feeling and looking younger.
  33. The wine aisle feels like an oasis of happiness.
  34. It’s the only investment you can drink.
  35. It’s Monday night and it’s going to be a long week.
  36. Tuesdays need to be appreciated too.
  37. Wednesday starts with the letter “W.”
  38. It’s Thursday and there’s still wine leftover from #WineWednesday.
  39. It’s Friday night and you (don’t) have plans.
  40. It’s Sunday night and Monday morning looms.
  41. Because five glasses in a bottle is a screaming good bargain.
  42. Because it’s time to call your mother.
  43. Because your mother-in-law just called.
  44. Because you removed your cellphone battery so that no one can call and interrupt your “Me Time.”
  45. Because you just deleted your facebook account.
  46. Your dinner plate looks lonely.
  47. The holidays are coming.
  48. The holidays are over.
  49. Networking events make you feel nauseous.
  50. Your office called you and told you not to come in tomorrow, or ever again.
  51. You didn’t get the job/girl/boy/loan/joke.
  52. Your grandma just asked you to help teach her how to use her smartphone.
  53. You’re getting married.
  54. You’re not getting married.
  55. 9 months carrying a baby made you very thirsty.
  56. It’s the sweetest reward for surviving rush hour traffic and not yelling expletives.
  57. It removes stage fright almost instantly.
  58. Because it takes the stress out of air travel including altitude, recycled air, feeling like a sardine, and the chatty Kathy next to you.
  59. Studies suggest that wine may increase the sexual appetite of women.
  60. It makes your jokes funnier.
  61. It makes everyone else’s jokes funnier.
  62. Because wine ages well implies that you’ll age well too.
  63. Your dance moves need all the help they can get.
  64. If the glass is half empty, you’re not a pessimist, you open another bottle.
  65. Gorgeous wine labels make you feel warm and fuzzy.
  66. There’s something incongruent with drinking beer in a bubble bath.
  67. Because Benjamin Franklin was on to something: “Wine makes daily living easier, less hurried, with fewer tensions and more tolerance.”
  68. How else were you planning to finish your term paper?
  69. Sometimes if you get the fermented juices flowing the creative juices will follow.
  70. Wine tasting parties bring together dozens of bottles in one place and you don’t even have to feel guilty about trying them all.
  71. You know you want to.
  72. There are so many words that sound better with the word “wine” in-front of them: bottle, box, bag, world, vacation, dinner, store, snorkel…
  73. The less you dust, the more expensive your collection looks.
  74. We should all participate in water conservation.
  75. Because “wine and food pairing” sounds like they’re not meant to be apart.
  76. The movie #Somm was equal parts scary and inspiring.
  77. You’re Italian/ French/ American/ Argentinian/ Human.
  78. Mulled wine is better than Febreze.
  79. Grapes are a foundational part of the food pyramid.
  80. It’s after dark.
  81. Because someone offered to buy you a drink–might as well taste the good stuff.
  82. Because you said you’d never try online dating, yet here you are.
  83. It’s an election year.
  84. It’s not an election year.
  85. Last week you finally identified a smoky flavor in wine and you want to see if you can do
    it again.
  86. Because sangria is practically a fruit salad, which makes it a health food.
  87. You’re trying to remember something.
  88. You’re trying to forget something.
  89. You need more room in the refrigerator shelf.
  90. Tailgating with Malbec tastes better.
  91. Wine is more delicious than straight-up vodka.
  92. It’s important to teach your kids good drinking habits.
  93. You need to wash the chocolate down with something.
  94. The calories have been counted and it’s clear that beer is not the winner.
  95. An article in your Facebook news feed says red wine is good for the heart.
  96. Because everyone knows red wine is good for a broken heart.
  97. It’s like a mini-vacation in a glass when you can’t leave the house.
  98. What other beverage offers antioxidants, probiotics, and a steady buzz?
  99. Because reading Wine Folly makes you thirsty.

About Madeline Puckette

James Beard award winning author and Wine Communicator of the Year. I co-founded Wine Folly to help people learn about wine. @WineFolly

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