Breakups come in all forms. Romantic, platonic, professional⊠they all have one thing in common: they hurt. Whatever the relationship, sometimes the only thing left to decide is whatâs in your glass. Here are six breakup wines and the situations to match them.
If youâre feeling righteous, drink Champagne. If youâre full of regret, try Tannat.
Whether you need a bottle for moving on, reflecting, or simply getting through the night, these breakup wines are here for the occasion.
They Cheated on You
Treat yourself to a Brunello di Montalcino.
When you find out your special someone is philandering, itâs devastating. If you were to write your feelings down, they might start on one extreme of the emotional spectrum and finish on the other. Either way, youâre not getting back the time and energy you spent. Time to grieve what happened, and then start moving forward.
There is no better way to appreciate yourself than opening a great bottle of wine just for you. To match the physicality of this particular circumstance, we think the best choice is Brunello di Montalcino. This Tuscan delight is 100% Sangiovese, which is Italyâs most widely planted red grape, and â get this â the grapeâs name is often said to derive from the Latin sanguis Jovis, or âthe blood of Jupiterâ. Brunello is one of those wines that needs time to open up, so decant it and sip it slowly.
You Made A Terrible Mistake
Try Tannat.
Most people who cheat or make other relationship-breaking mistakes justify their actions so they donât feel bad about them. So, if you actually feel guilt and regret, thereâs hope for you yet! If your own actions ended the relationship, take some time to understand why. Honest self-reflection is uncomfortable, but itâs usually worth it. The road to recovery is long and hard and, honestly, worth every penny and every moment you spend on it.
Pair your bottle with a journal, a therapy session, or whatever helps you understand why you got here. Try a bottle of Tannat and start rebuilding your habits one small decision at a time. Why Tannat?
Tannat is one of the worldâs most tannic red wines. Those gripping tannins naturally slow you down, making it almost impossible to gulp. Right now, thatâs exactly what you need. If youâre still swirling the same glass after an hour, then youâve learned the hardest part of mastering change: discipline. You got this.
The Love is Gone
Nothing says ânew chapterâ quite like popping a cork.
If youâve actually done the deed and itâs over, good for you. Yes, you had many good reasons to stay together (kids, finances, belongings, your past lives together, other family, etc.), but the fact of the matter is, you need to allow yourself to love again. The hardest part of this change is sorting out all the details.
Start your new reality with a bang. Of all the breakup wines on this list, Champagne might be the one that says ânew chapterâ the loudest. Open a bottle of vintage Champagne, Gran Reserva Cava, Millesimato Franciacorta, or any sparkler thatâs been lees-aged for about three years. Why? Long lees aging creates those irresistible brioche, toasted almond, and pastry aromas that make traditional-method sparkling wines feel like a celebration, even when youâre celebrating a fresh start.
They Became A Massive Jerk
Cabernetâs got your back
It started with little signs that you let slide because you loved them. Then, those little things got bigger and bigger until you realized (or maybe your friends did first) that theyâre not the same person. They donât love you; they use you. In fact, all those things you used to find cute you now see for what they really are. They are a jerk. Selfish. Gross. Healthy relationships shouldnât feel like constant damage control.
Time for a wine that treats you right. Itâs time for Cabernet Sauvignon. Great Cabernet Sauvignon is confident without trying too hard: structured and full of character. Most importantly: it ages well. Geez, it almost sounds like the prototype of a good relationship.
Unrequited Love
Drink a wine thatâs survived more history than your relationship.
Thereâs something about them you want, correction: you need. Unfortunately, they donât agree, so now youâre painfully alone. The longing is the hardest part. Itâs this constant ache in your gut that can become unbearable if you let your thoughts consume you. A new purpose wonât erase the feeling overnight, but it can help shift your attention toward whatâs next.
You might not think it, but itâs time to drink in some wisdom. For this, youâll want to sip vintage Boal Madeira, or a 40-year Tawny Port, or a Sherry from a 100-year solera⊠whatever it is, it better be older than you. Thereâs something about drinking old wine that has a funny way of changing perspective. This is exactly what you need right now.
Long Distance Breakup
Lighten up with rosé.
Breakup by distance. The most bittersweet of all partings. Itâs nothing anybody did. Itâs just circumstance. Maybe itâs the end. Maybe itâs not. You donât know. They donât know. Youâll need something to enjoy for the now, for the bad dates in a new city, and the inevitable 2 am Instagram stalk of your ex. Youâre in a situation where you can allow yourself to live in the moment.
RosĂ© is your wine of choice; it isnât trying to impress anyone. Itâs refreshing, versatile, and happiest when shared outside with friends. Thatâs probably where you should be, too. Drink the Provence rosĂ©. Then the Oregon rosĂ©. Then the sparkling rosĂ©. Consider it field research.