What Kind of Wine Drinker Are You?


June 12, 2013 Blog » Wine News & Entertainment » What Kind of Wine Drinker Are You?

The 10 Types of Wine Drinkers CARTOONS!

Evereyone has their own particular style. Below are the ten most common types of wine drinkers. Which one are you?


The Luddite

The Luddite Illustration

Just say ‘No’ to screw caps

The Luddite is unblushing in their love for the old way. Things like screwcaps, wine-in-a-box and fancy plastic aerators make The Luddite shiver in their boots. They can be found wandering down the French, Italian or Spanish wine aisle in search of terroir. They love real books with real pages. Places like Argentina or Napa Valley are far too young –even at 150 years– to earn The Luddite’s approval.

Curious about alternatives to wine corks?


The Local

The Drink Local Illustration

We make wine here too!

This wine lover has serious pride for their local juice. If you bring something over that’s not from their region, they’ll look at it like it’s rotten. Evangelism like this is essential for newer wine regions, such as Virginia, to grow and gain attention. Blinded by their own convictions, The Local often misses out on what the rest of the wine world has to offer.

Read more about unique wine regions.


The Cynic

The Cynic of Wine

Smart enough to be dangerous..

The Cynic will never really sit back and enjoy a glass of wine because they are too busy hyper-criticizing it. It’s not uncommon for The Cynic to constantly disregard what they’re drinking and bring up other vintages, regions and wines they prefer. The Cynic is usually very knowledgeable and good at picking out wine faults, acidity, alcohol level and tannin structure. Unfortunately The Cynic is never satisfied.

Guilty of taking wine too seriously sometimes?
I think it’s time to have a laugh about the language of wine critics and to remember to let go and enjoy.

The Analyzer

The Analyzer of Wine Comic

Do you get petrol?

The Analyzer always seems to have their eyes closed and their noses stuck in a glass. They murmur to themselves, blurting out aromas and tastes as they find them. Off the wall flavors like “Pickle Juice,” “Hot Dog,” and “Chew Toy” are not uncommon. This type of wine drinker is fun for exploratory purposes, but sometimes can get a little too nuanced and sour a good time.

Browse major wine varieties.


The Tried and True

The Tired and True Comic

Pinot Grigio please!

You’ll sit across this type of wine drinker at a restaurant and notice they’ll never even glance at the wine list before ordering. When they order they ask for a common varietal, without any acknowledgement of style or region. They could love other varietals and styles of wine but are lazy and unadventurous. When The Tried-and-True can’t order what they want, their fragile world crumbles. “What do you mean you don’t have Chardonnay?!”

Get inspired to explore different types of wine.


The Lush

The Wine Lush Comic

Let’s get another bottle!

The Lush is a lot of fun because of their enthusiasm to want to drink with you. This type of wine drinker is the polar opposite of The Analyzer because they are too busy swallowing to actually taste their wine. Watch out, they are charmers!

Are you a lush?
Learn how to stay healthy while drinking wine.

The Hoarder

The Hoarder of Wine Comic

Hoarder?! You mean Collector.

If you had to buy a larger wine cooler to replace the one you had, you might be a Hoarder. This type of wine drinker is great to have as a friend because they always have something around –as long as they’re willing to share. The Hoarder goes through seasonal wine shopping sprees where they buy wine by the case. Believe it or not, some Hoarders have so much wine they won’t be able to drink it all in their lifetime.

Are you a hoarder?
Host a blind tasting party to off-load some of your wine and inspire your friends to love wine too.

The Pusher

The Pusher Comic

How about we pop a bottle, or two, or nine.

You may have been introduced to a great wine by this type of wine drinker. The Pusher is a generous type who opts to share their wine with anyone just because they’re enthusiastic about it. They also love to get people drunk. Because of this, they tend to be a little heavy-handed and forget that it’s a weeknight. On the plus side, you’ll find they that their exuberant character will get you to delve into new wines all the time.


The Snob

The Wine Snob Comic

AKA The Name Dropper

We’ve all had the experience where we stand quietly and nod while someone rattles off a list of expensive shit they’ve done. A Wine Snob uses this form of one-upmanship to name-drop wineries where they’ve had some sort of first class experience. They may not even know that much about wine, but they’re more than happy to shove their insight into your face. When they walk away you’ll silently remind yourself never to talk to that person again.

Disarm a wine snob.

Where is #10!?

Submit the 10th Type of Wine Drinker in the comments below. (or up vote the best submission) We’ll add the best one you submitted above!


SOURCES
We were inspired by blog: Literature and Libation and their article 10 Types of Beer Drinkers.


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By Madeline Puckette
I'm a certified wine geek with a passion for meeting people, travel, and delicious food. You often find me crawling around dank cellars or frolicking through vineyards.